When I picked up Lillian from “school” today, her carer, Mitra, told me she’d been troublesome – misbehaving and “not listening.”
“Lillian, have you been bad today?” She adopts her classic “reluctant to admit or apologise” demeanour – shoulders shrugged, head turned, cheek on shoulder, eyes looking up.
Later that night, I’m installing a new dryer. I’ve removed and then replaced the washing machine, but forgot to hook up the waste water hose to the outlet. Halfway through the next load of washing, suddenly we’ve got water flooding the laundry/kitchen floor.
I run to the bathroom to grab an armful of towels to try to staunch the flow. Teresa and Lillian are in the bath.
Teresa: “What have you done?!?”
Lillian: “Daddy, have you been done bad?”
Me: “Everything’s OK…”
Lillian, turning to Teresa: “Daddy’s been bad.”
My mum cooked the whole snapper for Lillian and she really liked it. She loves fish eye balls and fish brain.
Lillian has been learning to use the computer.
Here’s her first computer drawing:
Lillian: “Daddy, I’m asleep!”
“No you’re not!”
“Yes I am!”
“Well if you’re asleep, how come your eyes are open?”
Lillian thinks for a minute, then theatrically closes her eyes.
We’re at the farm, and Lillian has been suddenly seized by the urge, and has done a poo outside.
Later: “Daddy, only birdies poo outside.”
“Then why did you poo outside?”
Lillian thinks for a moment.
“I’m a birdie!”
And while in the vicinity of toilet habits, she is toilet trained and quite reliable, but sometimes has a little accident. Today we were at church in Foster. Lillian disappeared out the back. She was gone for a while, and I went to investigate. She was standing in the kitchen (in which, sometimes, biscuits can be found), looking sheepish, in a puddle.
“Daddy, I peed in my undies.”
Quickly, Daddy finds himself on hands and knees mopping up before anyone else comes along.
I’m about to use the remote control to activate the DVD player.
“I do it!! I’m a big girl now!”
Lillian spills some juice on the carpet. I hand her a dishcloth to wipe it up with. (Other times, she very much enjoys cleaning spots on the wall, floor etc. with a rag and Ajax spray cleaner.)
“Daddy, I can’t do it.” “Why not?” “I’m not a big girl yet.”
Lillian comes in waving my razor from the bathroom. “I fixed it!”
I say, “Very good!”
“Say thank you!” she says.
“Say shia shia!” (Mandarin for thank you)
“Say shia shia for fixing it, Daddy!”
“Shia shia for fixing it” I say, still unsure exactly what she fixed.
Us (stern voice): “Lillian, put that icecream back in the freezer please.”
Lillian: “Don’t tell me! You don’t tell me!”